Wingmanning. It's a bit of a minefield, and it's way easier to be branded a terrible one than a good one; for example, I'm not good at socialising if left alone so am guilty of standing next to the person I'm supposed to be wingmanning and refusing to leave their side until they're having sex. Which isn't great, so probably don't make me your wingman ever. Unlike Taylor Swift who Ed Sheeran called 'a brilliant wingman' after his recent break-up, in her bid to become the Best And Nicest Person In The World. She's doing well so far.
So how do you wingman effectively? I did a whip round to work out exactly what to look for in a wingman, and how to tell if your mate's going to be a good one or not. And, for the purposes of readability, I'm going to use the term 'wingman' and you can all quietly say to yourselves 'or woman!' in your own heads each time it's mentioned.
Sociability
You need someone who will flourish in any social situation, especially if left alone in a club full of strangers while you try to snog someone in the corner. You need someone who will keep the One You Don't Fancy in conversation, allowing you to ensnare the One You Do Fancy. You need someone who can read situations as sensitively as a bomb disposal person reads bombs (making sure nothing explodes) as well as being able to sparkly sociably without hogging all the limelight. People who need the attention constantly do not make good wingmen, because you won't be able to get a word in.
Timing
They have to be able to stay out as late as you, and not be the sort of person to cry off early (I always cry off early - I repeat, don't make me your wingman ever). On the other hand, if you're the sort of person who doesn't like to go mega late then it's good to have a wingman who doesn't stay in the club/bar until 6am and tell you about all the hot men/women she boned while you were in bed like a saddo.
Attitude
Positive. Positive positive positive. Tonight is about pulling, and pulling is a delicate art full of rejections, so your wingman has to be the sort of person who laughs off the huge queue (maybe you'll get chatting to some fit people), the expensive drinks (an excuse to get fit people to buy you drinks) and the guy who says he has a girlfriend (there are a hundred others in here, on to the next one!).
Eye sight
Your wingman should have spotted someone who's your type within minutes of walking into the room and will be beelining you towards them. Preferably, your wingman will also have laser vision that can see through walls, but you can't have everything. Just being able to identify your 'type' is probably enough, so they don't get you in a conversation.
Relationship status
Both single and loved-up girls can make excellent wingmen - the stereotype is that, once someone is in a relayshe, they're no longer good wingmen is total crap because it means you've got a friend who literally can't pull the people you're after. She can genuinely wingman you, without accidentally putting her tongue in anyone's mouth and oh my god I was so drunk and I thought you liked HIM omg babe I'm soooo sorrry.
Alcohol intake
Should be similar to you, but not worse. So your pulling attempts aren't thwarted by your wingman throwing up on your Object Of Affection's shoes, but equally, you're not made to feel bad for drinking more than them. It's not quite the same if you're throwing ridiculous shapes in a club after loads of vodka while your wingman soberly knocks back Diet Cokes; you won't be on the same page. Of course, there are people who don't really drink and are incredibly sociable, fun people so if you have one of these then cherish them. And hey, more vodka for you.
Qualifications
Must be able to competently fly a plane.
Like this? You might also be interested in...
Why Being Single Is Brilliant. By Someone Who Is No Longer Single
Single-Shaming Needs To Stop: Your 20s Is The Best Time To Be Unattached
Follow Stevie on Twitter: @5tevieM
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.