What Your Pyjamas Say About The State Of Your Relationship

Black n’ lacy doesn’t always spell bliss

Rory-DCS

by Jess Commons |
Published on

Are you more of a silky slip kinda gal or, come midnight, do you strap yourself into the onesie and snuggle down under the covers? Both are excellent options but when you’re in a relationship, these sorts of decisions take on a political nature.

Here’s what your PJs say about the state of your relationship.

READ MORE: A Few Sartorial Signs That You’re Already In Winter Mode

‘Pyjamas? What are they?’

You guys are fucking awesome. After sex you just pull apart, roll straight into a well-practised spoon and go straight to sleep, errant bodily fluids and all. Hell, you’ve even fallen asleep with him inside you on occasion.

As long as you keep your nakedness in the house, then you keep on doing exactly when you’re doing – you’ve achieved the ultimate relationship goal. Well done you on your fantastic relationship.

Black and lacy

There is absolutely no way you’re comfortable in that thing, is there? If you’re really truly honest with yourself, you’d much rather be in a big mess of jumpers and tracksuit bottoms and achieve Maximum Comfort in a very real way.

The only reason you’ve really got the satin is to bring a sexy atmosphere to the bedroom. Well, you know what? Real men should find you sexy in cotton as well as silk, so if he says otherwise, give him the old heave ho.

Matching top and bottoms from John Lewis

First things first, there’s no doubt in our mind that you look ADORABLE. If you’ve just got a pair for Christmas or your birthday and you’re trying them out, then no worries.

If however, it’s a few months later and you’ve done matchy matchy every single time you’ve worn them, then we’re slightly concerned you guys are more or less one step away from becoming Ned and Maude Flanders – separate beds and a peck on the cheek in lieu of sex to prevent getting spunk on your nice new sheets. Which are apricot in colour BTW.

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Whatever you had on that day

While you guys are super-fun, may we suggest cutting back on the drinking slightly? Falling into bed fully clothed might be OK once a week, but any more than that and we’re guessing you’re drunk more than you’re sober, in which case – do you know your boyfriend but at all or have you got a Fun Bobby situation on your hands?

The ripped, stained and smelly sweats you always wear

Hey, you guys are comfortable with each other and that’s cool, but may we suggest there’s such a thing as ‘too’ comfortable? If you’re pooing with the door open and forgoing showers in lieu of sharing a tupperware of leftovers out of the fridge, you might fall into that bracket.

You guys are probably fine as a couple but there’s a fair chance your friends are forgetting who you both are. Maybe have a think about leaving the house this weekend? Just a suggestion.

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Follow Jess on Twitter @Jess_Commons

Picture: Rory DCS

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.

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