This time last year people were basically apoplectic (really angry, like biblically angry) that Miley Cyrus had dared to twerk on Robin Thicke at the MTV VMAs. Now the world has seen so much actual torment and horror (see: this summer's news stories) they're not really that bothered about the sexy bits of the show. Nor are they that disturbed by the mediocrity of 5SOS. But here's what they are still talking about one day on from the MTV Music Video Awards 2014:
Taylor Swift dancing
Or not dancing, however you'd like to define Taylor's physical reactions to music. Her mom-dancing was totally appropriate for the occasion, though, being sat next to Lorde and her mum (in fact, Lorde's mum was in-between them!) during the show.
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Beyoncé's performance ft. Blue Ivy being spectacular
Striding through a medley of all of her biggest hits from her most recent album, BEYONCÉ, the singer (and dancer, she's definitely a dancer too) gave a speedy, pitch-perfect, husky rundown of all that you missed at the tour. You can watch it – and daughter Blue Ivy's sassy reactions – in the video below. If it's been taken down, you'll have to make do with the following Blue Ivy gifs.
Katy Perry and this guy Riff Raff turning up as Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake circa 2001
Katy and Riff Raff, who have collaborated on a song called* This Is How We Do*, which is uncannily out in America this week, turned up dressed in matching denim and rhinestone outfits to throw back to that time Britney and Justin walked the red carpet looking like a pile-up in a Levi's factory.
Nicki Minaj's bum/wardrobe malfunction
If you've seen the Anaconda cover art, or video, you'll know that Nicki Minaj has got quite an asset in her bum, so of course she was going to put it about at an awards show that's historically been about getting attention. But it wasn't just her performance of Anaconda that upset various parents' leagues around America, but when she guest featured in Usher's performance she basically got her bum headbutted by the singer.
Miley Cyrus bringing a homeless date to the awards
Taking her cue, perhaps, from Marlon Brando, who once sent a Native American up to collect an Oscar on his behalf in order to draw attention to their plight, Miley Cyrus took a (gorgeous) homeless man, Jesse Pelt to the awards to draw attention to his cause.
Collecting the award for* Wrecking Ball being the video of the year or something,* he said: 'I am accepting this award on behalf of the 1.6 million runaways and homeless youth in the United States who are starving and lost and scared for their lives. I know, because I am one of those people' and directed people
to learn about My Friend's Place, the charity which accommodates him.
Miley, who looked on tearfully as Jesse gave the acceptance speech and took him to In-N-Out burger after the awards, later told Ryan Seacrest: ''If I'm going to be given this loud of a voice and this big of an image and this big of a platform and this huge of an opportunity to talk to young people in American right now, what am I really trying to say? Because I don’t think what I was trying to say is what happened the year before.'
Kim Kardashian's boobs
Oh, and the fact that she introduced Sam Smith of all people to perform, saying that the pair (her and Sam, not her boobs) are 'good friends.' Who knew?! There was also an apparent bit where, during a moment of silence to commemorate Michael Brown, the teenager who was unarmed when he was shot by a police officer in Ferguson two weeks ago, Kim and sisters Kylie and Kendall were checking their phones. Reported by the MailOnline, the footage was cut from the broadcast we saw, so we'd like to give them the benefit of the doubt...
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Pictures: Getty, @mileycyrus
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.