We Tried On All The Tartan In Topshop So You Don’t Have To

Because you want the best checked stuff but without a changing room bunfight, right?

main

by Pandora Sykes |
Published on

There were a few reasons it made sense to start The Debrief’s new ‘Changing Room Selfies’ series in Topshop’s HQ on Oxford Street. One: you can take up to 12 items in at any one time. (Sidenote: it’s actually bloody hard to carry that many.) Two: It’s a shop that’s got a loo (crucial). And three: it’s got a lot of tartan in stock (handy, considering this is the trend that’s been championed by all our favourite designers we can’t afford right now, from Saint Laurent to Stella McCartney).

[ASSETHERE=image]

Sadly, I’d forgotten to shave my legs or bring a pair of tights (give me a break, it’s winter), so apologies for any stray leg hair shown up by harsh lighting. Check out how tidy my changing room is, though. I did that just for you.

**First up… something with a touch of Stella McCartney about it **

[ASSETHERE=image]

Now, we’re not suggesting that you try to pull this off as a bonafide piece of Stella McCartney at your next weekend brunch date, but there is something satisfying about finding a piece that pays tribute to that £700 sell-out mohair knit, which you can say you found in Topshop. For £45. The ridiculous softness of this Premium Fluffy Check Sweat and disproves that boring fashion rule that says you can’t wear pink and red together.

Next up… what fashion mags would call a monochrome mash-up

 

Apologies if this has the same effect as that Magic Eye poster you had hanging on your bedroom wall for at least three months in 1998 before it began to blind even your Beanie Babies. But if you can get over that – and as you’ll see from the apparent ecstasy in right hand selfie, I did – I think these clashing checks of this Gingham Scuba Tee, £28, and Gingham Aline Skirt, £36, really work. There’s something very Celine about them, which can never be a bad thing. FYI, there’s a texture clash, too – this top feels like it’s made of neoprene and the skirt’s the kind of wool you want to stroke.

The crucial question… can a tartan shirt work on its own?

 

The best thing about changing room selfies is that I can ignore any grounds of propriety. IRL a friend might caution that you can’t wear a (very nice and soft) Oversized Check Shirt, £30, with nothing underneath, but in here no-one’s cautioning me that I might flash inappropriately. Still, I thought it was important to actually investigate - via a few ‘bend and snaps’ – whether or not you can see my bum. And you couldn’t. So there. Oh, and that’s not a bunny tail, BTW. It’s a security tag.

[ASSETHERE=image]

That said, in the interests of “outfit building”, I added a checked trench (only available in store) – something that’s since made it on to my evergreen Topshop wish list. And when it’s belted, it still looks like I’m wearing nothing underneath. That gets a thumbs up from me.

Can double tartan ever actually work?

 

I’m obsessed with double tartan. This look features the oversized shirt (again) and a Red Pleated Tartan Kilt, £38. And I think this Swampy-esque MA1 bomber (only available online in blue), £55, adds a practical note to my checkered ensemble. (OK, who am I kidding?) This is all beginning to look a bit repetitive now, isn’t it? If #CRS was a challenge, this would be the moment I started to stumble. My changing room’s still looking nice and tidy though, isn’t it? desperately deflects

What happened with stripes meet checks…

 

The tartan tee I’d initially intended to pair with this kilt (this is mainline Topshop, but there is also an epic range of kilts in Topshop’s vintage section) is beginning to sting my eyes a bit. So I opted for my Petit Bateau breton I’d arrived in instead and a Collarless Pinstripe Jacket, £60. Clearly I thought it worked, because at the end of #CRS this kilt joined my actual closet. I can see now that #CRS is going to be an expensive piece of ‘work’.

Goodbye through some gingham…

 

Now I like a selfie as much as the last person (OK, more) but this is starting to feel like The Marathon Of Me. I’m lonely. I’m thirsty. I almost fall asleep, as you can see. I’m hot and 30 minutes in front of a changing room mirror lit by abrasive lights can make any girl in a mismatched underwear set feel a bit like a piece of gammon. But before I go, this Mix Gingham Shirt, £30? Pretty sharp, I say. [

](http://www.topshop.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?searchTerm=gingham+shirt&storeId=12556&productId=13432037&urlRequestType=Base&categoryId=&langId=-1&productIdentifier=product&catalogId=33057)

Follow Pandora on Twitter @pinsykes

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.

Just so you know, whilst we may receive a commission or other compensation from the links on this website, we never allow this to influence product selections - read why you should trust us